Life in the Neighborhood



Daniel Striped Tiger

"There is no normal life that is free of pain. It's the very wrestling with our problems that can be the impetus for our growth." -Mr. Rogers

It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood... Words that most people are going to recognize - the opening song to Mister Rogers' Neighborhood.

I'm confident and man enough to admit I watched this show long past an age where most would quit watching. (Though I know some of you feel me on this one, because you still watch Arthur on PBS now, too.)

Anyway, Mr. Rogers the man was full of wisdom. And that quote at the top really resonates with me. This might as well be a continuation of yesterday's post. No normal life is free of pain. It's a fact that we cannot escape. Life is a big roller coaster ride.

Yet it's in and through that pain where we can experience growth. How so? Well, it's very simple. The pain and the problems humble us. It's hard to think more highly of yourself that you ought to (the definition of pride) when you've fallen off that cliff. The pain and the problems reveal to us our need for help.

Last year was such a time for me. Without turning this blog into a dissertation (big word), an issue for me is dealing with stress in, well, not good ways. More to the point, I tend to keep it bottled up, only for it to blow up in my face. So rather than talk about the stress or something constructive, it was bottled up and eventually became heart palpitations. Which I'm here to say: those suck and are scary to experience.

Needless to say that was a low point. A very low point. And recovering from that low point took a lot of time, learning, and re-learning what I had already learned but failed to act on. You can see more of what I learned here. Without that low point, I wouldn't have truly appreciated the words of Paul in Philippians 4:6-7 nor experienced the peace that does pass understanding. Without that low point, I wouldn't have seen the way I handle stress (because it piled on for a while) and worry. I grew from that low point.

Mr. Rogers got it right. The pain can be the impetus for our growth. Or it can continue to send us spiraling out of control as we continue to believe we have everything under control and don't need help - from above and/or others. If you don't see the need for help, you'll never grow. But if you finally admit that you have no control whatsoever, that's when things can slowly begin turning around.

I promise I'll have something light-hearted posted here soon, but when you get inspired by sunrises and the Neighborhood of Make Believe, you have to write about them.

-D

"But God..."

I snapped this picture on my phone this morning crossing the small skybridge between the parking garage and office building. It fit with what I have been thinking about.


Life is not easy. Let's be honest - it sucks sometimes. There are a lot of times that are not any fun. That's just reality.

The pastor at my church (also a great friend and mentor to me) snapped a picture yesterday that also fit in with I have been thinking about. Yesterday was a cloudy, rainy Monday, but toward late afternoon the skies began clearing. In his picture there were patches of blue breaking through the gray clouds.


Life can throw a lot of gray clouds rain storms hurricanes at us. Storms that shake us and leave us wondering if there is an end in sight. Life has peaks and valleys, but it also has cliffs from which we free fall and keep falling. I know. I've been there. To keep hoping for a bottom that hasn't come yet? It sucks.


The Psalmist in Psalm 73:26 says, "My heart and flesh may fail..." Translation? "I'm defeated. I'm falling. And I'm waiting to hit the bottom." Sound familiar? Stress, worry, money, job, relationships. You name it. Anything can send us free falling.


The Psalmist doesn't stop at, "My heart and flesh may fail..." Our stories don't end at "I'm defeated." The free fall doesn't go on and on.


"... but God..." is what the Psalmist writes. Two words. Six letters. Infinite power. "But God." We don't even have to read the rest of the verse. "But God." Translation? "It's over." The free fall will end. The light is coming. The blue skies are coming.


"... but God is the strength of my heart, my portion forever." Yeah, life may suck right now. Yes, the valley is dark and deep. But God is. And that is all we need.


There's a song by Matt Maher called "Alive Again"...

I woke up in darkness
surrounded by silence
oh where, where have I gone?
I woke to reality
losing its grip on me
oh where, where have I gone?
Cause I can see the light
before I see the sunrise
You called and you shouted
broke through my deafness
now I’m breathing in
and breathing out
I’m alive again!
You shattered my darkness
washed away my blindness
now I’m breathing in
and breathing out
I’m alive again!

The skies will clear. The storms will end. Hold onto that glimmer of light that creeps over the horizon, because the darkness will be shattered.


-D

College Football Week 3 Picks Recap

This Week: 1-5

Season to Date: 10-8

-D

RT, Please?

Social media. Buzz words that have taken the world by storm the last few years. With good reason, too. Suddenly it's become hip and cool to be on Twitter, Facebook, Google+, LinkedIn, Instagram, FourSquare, Lifeshare, Pinterest, PPL, ULive, FindMe, and LetsBeFriendsEvenThoughWeNeverLikedEachOtherInHighSchool. (Note: some of those aren't real.)

You get my point. There are a lot of sites out there falling under the "social media" umbrella. All of them try to offer something different. All of them are trying to find their niche in the Interwebs. Which means we the consumers have to find our niche as well.

Therein lies the problem. It's very easy to get caught up in the tidal wave. Of trying to be on every site. Of trying to attract a following on every site. It's middle and high school all over again, trying to fit in with the popular kids and get that all important popularity boost. More followers or friends or likes or +1's mean more people like you. To become popular, you decide to change who you are and write stuff that really isn't you. What good does that do? You're already caught up in the rat race of real life. Why carry that over to social media?

Sure, I've had grand delusions of having a blog read by thousands of people every day with site sponsors or having my witty, sometimes cynical tweets retweeted across the globe. But that would mean changing who I am, or at least who I want you to think I am.

My wife I think has it figured out, at least more than I do. She recently culled her Facebook friends down to 110. From somewhere north of 400. Why? Because she didn't interact with 75% of those people. She didn't care how toasted they got or how they were never happy or blah blah blah. At 110 friends, she's more interactive. She and fellow moms can talk about being moms. She can put up a question and get several responses in an hour. That's the value of social media. Finding your niche and creating community within that niche. If that niche only has 50 people, that's 50 people you can interact with, support, and encourage.

That's my opinion anyway. What's yours?

-D

College Football Week 3 Picks

Some rather important games on the schedule this weekend, including a showdown in Tallahassee that I'm excited about. Onward we go!

LSU @ Mississippi State (+4.5): A Thursday night showdown in the SEC. LSU might be the team to beat in the SEC West (Alabama may disagree of course), and Mississippi State does not want to start the season 0-2 in the division. Thursday night. Home underdog. The cowbells ringing through the night. The only thing I'm worried about is how Les Miles manages to pull out a victory, but we'll ride the Bullies again.
The Pick: Mississippi State 16-13

Auburn @ Clemson (-3.0): It was wild and crazy, but Auburn found a way to stop Mississippi State at the 3-inch line last week. This week, they travel to Clemson, where the battle of the Tigers should again be another crazy game. At some point, Auburn will lose. My expert analysis says they will this week.
The Pick: Clemson 35-27

Tennessee @ Florida (-9.0): This game now is a little more interesting since Tennessee is actually good some people think Florida may be "down" this year. I wish they still had ties in college football, because I would certainly hope for one here. One team will win. One team will lose. I don't really care which one is which.
The Pick: Florida 31-24

Michigan State @ Notre Dame (-4.5): At some point, I'll quit picking Notre Dame games, but picking against them is too fun. They might win finally, but they won't cover.
The Pick: Notre Dame 23-21

Louisville @ Kentucky (-6.0): Let me be perfectly clear. I grew up in Memphis; I cheer for Kentucky; I want Memphis to do well, too. There was absolutely no way Louisville stood a chance at being liked by me. Kentucky will make it 5 straight victories over the Dirty Birds. No question about it.
The Pick: Kentucky 27-17

Game of the Week:
Oklahoma @ Florida State (+3.5): #1 vs. #5. This showdown is going to feature talent all over the field. Jimbo Fisher has the 'Noles on the right track, and a win for the 'Noles would catapult them into BCS consideration. Last year, Oklahoma humiliated FSU in Norman. This year the Seminoles will get revenge.
The Pick: Florida State 34-31

There you have it, my readers. 6 games. 6 picks.

-D

Love in Action

18 Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth. (My italics)

Now here's a verse that I think everyone would agree with. It's very easy to tell someone, "I love you." It's slightly more challenging to actually show someone, "I love you."

Why is that? Because love in action requires putting another's interests ahead of our own. Words can be empty and hollow. Actions can't be. They have to be planned out and then carried out. Words can be picked out of thin air. Actions develop in the heart. Love in action means love in the heart.

For instance, love in action could mean emptying the dishwasher without being prompted (something I could do more of). It could mean getting the baby ready for bed and sitting with her while your wife has some time to herself. Love in action means figuring out what makes your friend/spouse/whoever feel most loved. This book and its other iterations give great insight into the basic ways people both give and receive love.

The bottom line is that we must show love to those we love. The words that come out of our mouth must line up with our actions. If there's a disconnect, the meaning of those words or actions loses value.

Let us not forget the example of love: "This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him."

Have a great day!

-D

College Football Week 2 Picks Recap

Time to recap and see what that Monopoly money did for me.

Central Michigan @ Kentucky - I predicted 28-14, and the final score was 27-13. For almost 3 quarters, fans in the Commonwealth were left wondering how a 6-win season was even possible. Then the offense came to life, and a fourth and goal from the 1 touchdown provided the 14-point margin of victory. (1-0)

Mississippi State @ Auburn - Were it not for another game that night, this may have been the game of the day, a back and forth affair of momentum swings and money changing hands. Mississippi State lost the Cam Newton sweepstakes last year, and they wound up about 3 inches short of a tying touchdown as time expired this year. I said it would be close, and it certainly was. (2-0)

Alabama @ Penn State - SEC speed. That's all you really need to say here. Alabama's defense is strong, and if the offense can do just enough, they'll be right there in the chase for the BCS championship. (3-0)

Cincinnati @ Tennessee - By all accounts, the Bruce Pearl Bobblehead Day was successful, but everyone seems to be denying that they received his BBQ book. Strange. Maybe this week someone will post a picture of it. Oh yeah, UT won big. Blah blah blah. (3-1)

Memphis @ Arkansas State - At some point, Memphis really just needs to consider donating the football team to my alma mater - Christian Brothers University and using the tax refund to buy out R.C. Johnson's contract. Either that, or not schedule Sun Belt conference teams.  (4-1)

Notre Dame @ Michigan - Game. Of. The. Day. Michigan scrambles from 17 down to take the lead in the fourth, only to see Notre Dame score with 30 seconds left, only for them to completely blow an assignment and give up a huge pass play and then touchdown with 2 seconds left to lose 35-31. This continues to prove my point: Notre Dame is overrated. (5-1)

This Week: 5-1

Season-to-Date: 9-3

More winners from this weekend: America.

Have a great week!

-D

College Football Week 2 Picks

As we all know, today is Saturday, and that means that it's time to place your bets...

Central Michigan @ Kentucky (-10.5): Normally I try not to pick games of the teams I actually like, but I'm making exceptions this week. Kentucky beat Western Kentucky 14-3 in a game that was every bit as exciting as a 14-3 game sounds. I say the Cats respond this week, maybe by even scoring more than 2 touchdowns.
The Pick: Kentucky 28-14

Mississippi State @ Auburn (+6.0): You'd think winning a game 156-9 last week would prove how great your team is. But when the team on the end of that beat down is Memphis, you have take it with a grain of salt, because Memphis could make a broken toaster look good. Auburn somehow paid off escaped with a win over Utah State. That will not happen this time, but it will be close.
The Pick: Mississippi State 31-28

Alabama @ Penn State (+10.5): Alabama's defense looked pretty stout last weekend against some team from the Midwest. The Crimson Tide travel to Happy Valley now to face the Nittany Lions in a battle of odd colors. JoePa is coaching from the grave press box again (I think). Not that it will matter.
The Pick: Alabama 28-10

Cincinnati @ Tennessee (-4.5): One of my other rules is try not to pick games involving teams I can't stand. We're making an exception this week. It's Bruce Pearl Bobblehead Day at Neyland. The first 25,000 fans get a free bobblehead and barbecue book signed by Bruce himself.
The Pick: Cincinnati 27-23

Memphis @ Arkansas State (-17.0): I can't believe the line on this one. (Thinks back to last week.) Oh, wait, yes I can.
The Pick: Arkansas State 42-20

Game of the Week:
Notre Dame @ Michigan (+3.5): We'll call this one the Lightning Bowl, since both teams were affected by storms last Saturday. The University of Michigan finally joins the 20th century by adding a night game for the first time ever. Notre Dame is still overrated.
The Pick: Michigan 35-28

There you have it, ladies and gents. 6 games. 6 picks. 6 chances to ruin your kid's college savings.

-D

College Football Week 1 Picks Recap

After a weekend full of touchdowns and lightning delays, it is time to check in and see why you shouldn't rely on my analysis...

Kent State @ Alabama - Alabama wins 48-7. I figured the Tide would roll (pun intended) over the Golden Flashes. A dominating defense will need to be ready for Happy Valley this weekend. (1-0)

South Florida @ Notre Dame - South Florida wins 23-20. Look, I don't care who's coaching the Irish. I'm sure all Notre Dame people are nice. But when will the people who vote on these polls realize Notre Dame is ranked at least 10 spots too high every season. I thought ND would struggle, not shoot themselves in the foot over and over.  (2-0)

UCLA @ Houston - Houston wins 38-34. I said 35-31 Houston. That's pretty darn good. You'd think I could do this picking thing for a living.  (3-0)

BYU @ Ole Miss - BYU wins 14-13. We saw some Stormin' Mormon fans at the Memphis Zoo yesterday. The cougars smiled at them; the black bears growled at them; and I was surprised they made it out of The Grove.  (3-1)

Boise State vs. Georgia - Boise State wins 35-21. Even Georgia's snazzy uniforms could not stop the Broncos. The Boise Bandwagon will be full again this year.  (4-1)

Oregon vs. LSU - LSU wins 40-27. Maybe Les Miles is sane, and we're the ones who are crazy. I don't know. But he gets the job done. Oregon had too many turnovers but did have the coolest uniforms of the weekend.  (4-2)

Season to Date: 4-2

More winners from this weekend: Mississippi State's offensive ratings, Auburn's special teams' coach, Rice's band ($EC)

Other losers this weekend: The Larry Porter Revolution, Maryland's helmets, UK's wide receivers, and Tennessee (because I'm the author of this post)

-D

College Football Week 1 Picks

Do you hear that sound? The one that's been getting louder and louder since August? It's the sound of college football. With it comes a new season of incorrect picks and sarcastic, witty commentary. I'll be picking against the spread this year, which means a disclaimer that you should never place any wagers on any games based on these selections and analysis. With that out of the way, I'll be getting the spread for each game from here, using the "BETONLINE.COM" numbers. So let's get to the picks!

Kent State @ Alabama (-38.0): It's been an emotional 4 months for the city of Tuscaloosa in the aftermath of the worst tornado outbreak in history. Football season (and a highly-ranked team) will provide some relief and distraction from the rebuilding process. Emotions will be high, and the Tide should cruise to a W.
The Pick: Alabama 49-7

South Florida @ Notre Dame (-11.0): Year 2 of the Brian Kelly Experiment. I don't know much about either team. What I do know is this seems like a game where the Irish will struggle. I don't know why, but that's the sort of analysis you get when you come here.
The Pick: Notre Dame 27-23

UCLA @ Houston (-2.5): Houston has a QB who has a chance to break all sorts of NCAA passing records this season. It's like when you play NCAA __ on your favorite console and do nothing but throw the ball and blitz. Not that I've ever done that.
The Pick: Houston 35-31

BYU @ Ole Miss (+3.0): (Trying to resist jokes about Mormons in The Grove.) BYU's first season as an independent begins at place where Southern Belles and preppy prep school guys learn to live on their own and learn the limits of, well, The Grove. Can the Black Bears get it done? Can the Stormin' Mormons make it of Oxford 1-0? Can I add any more questions to this analysis?
The Pick: BYU 31-24

And we have two games of the week this week! A double feature on this opening weekend!
Boise State vs. Georgia (+3.0): You either love Boise State or hate them like you hate little fluffy kittens and Santa Claus. The BCS hopefuls need this win to establish themselves as party-crashers. Coach Richt needs this win to cool off the hotseat in Athens. I think you know where this pick is going...
The Pick: Boise State 34-28

Oregon vs. LSU (+4.0): This one will be fun. Two teams ranked in the top 5. Two teams with some off-field distractions this summer. Two teams with BCS titles dancing in their heads. Ducks vs. Tigers. Pac-12 (that's weird to type) speed vs. SEC speed. Who prevails? Quack quack!
The Pick: Oregon 33-25


There you have it, my friends. 6 games. 6 picks. 6 reasons why I'm not quitting my day job! Enjoy your long Labor Day weekend, and be safe!

-D

On Comfy Chairs and Love

Every once in a while we need reminders and perspective on the preciousness and value of love. Tonight was my reminder.

You see, our sweet daughter has been undergoing a barrage of teething the last few months. Not just any teething mind you, but the dreaded molars - the big ones - have been popping through. For whatever reason, the last one-year molar is soooooo close to erupting, which, by the way, might be the worst term ever for a tooth coming in, but has yet to break the surface.

Anyway, poor Ny had been struggling for 45 minutes, obviously hurting and obviously not happy about it. Our best efforts at helping her were falling on swollen gums and big tears. It's difficult to listen to any baby cry like that, but when she's your kid, it's even more so.

So Dada gets her ready for bed. She's still upset and still hurting. Down we sit in the big, new comfy chair in her room, with her "lovey" in hand and finger in her mouth. Still very upset, she wiggled around until she found the perfect spot on Dada's chest - the spot where everything feels better and things don't hurt as much.

As I sat there, softly singing (not well mind you) some good ol' hymns, the teaching moment happened. All Ny wanted at that point was relief and comfort. She needed snuggle time, and I was the one who could help her. I was the one who could love her like no one else. What an incredible, incredible picture of the unconditional love of the Almighty God - who will love us like no else and hold us when we are unlovely, crying, in pain, and in need of help. She calmed down and slowly drifted off to sleep, content that Dada was there.

With tears in my eyes, two thoughts came to mind: 1) what a lesson on unconditional love parenthood is, and 2) to treasure moments like this, because it won't be like this for long.

-D

Sent from my iPad

Does It Get Any Better Than This?

Here's another special "From the Vault" from August 26, 2010. That sweet little girl resting her head on Dada isn't so little anymore but is still just as sweet. And sometimes, when she's in the right mood (see: tired) she will lay her head on my chest or shoulders. Nyla, those shoulders and chest will always be available to you whenever you need them.

I don't think so!

-D

He Alone

He alone is my rock and my salvation, my stronghold; I will not be shaken.

"He alone..."

David in two words has made a huge statement of faith. He's not relying on his riches or his power or his armies. He's relying on God alone as a stronghold. (He certainly wouldn't be relying on the stock markets today.) If anyone had reason up to then to rely on things he had done or accumulated, David was the guy.

"He alone..." But David doesn't do that. And with good reason. If David couldn't see God as his rock, salvation, and stronghold, then I'm not sure who could. His route to the kingship was, shall we say, a little difficult, having spent time running from Saul. David had to wait for his moment to become king. He had to rest in the promise God made to him.

So what does it mean to have God as our rock and stronghold? It means we have stability. It means our current mood/status does not depend on what the economy is doing, what leaders are in charge, or _______. Temporal, material things don't shake us, because we have place our trust and faith in the eternal Creator. And when we do let things get to us and face stress, anxiety, conflict, etc, we can climb back to our rock quickly.

In verse 8, David gives us advice on making God or rock and stronghold. "Trust in Him at times... pour out your hearts before Him."

"He alone..."

-D

Tales from the Registry

In this edition of "From the Vault," I opine on registering for gifts for our wedding. This post was originally written August 25, 2007. Gosh I'm getting old. That was almost 4 years ago. Anyway, enjoy my ramblings...

You know? This wedding stuff can be fun. Case in point - registering for stuff. Now before we begin, you have to know that I am somewhat of a fan of shopping. I do enjoy going to Target or Wal-Mart, wandering around aimlessly looking for things I don't need but are cool (see: office supplies, pens specifically). There are times when I go in and get out, because I know what it is I am looking for (see Best Buy, where if I wandered around long enough, they would probably ask me where I wanted my cot). Anyways, I digress...

So it was last Tuesday (as in not this past one but the one before that). Fiancee and I are wandering around Wolfchase, just walking and being together. She asks if I want to go to Macy's and register. Sure. Why not? At least I'll see how boring it is and won't be going again with Ginny. Of course I get proven wrong. The lady gets all the information from us, yadda yadda yadda, blah blah blah... scanner gun... blah blah blah... scanner gun. Note the only words I paid attention to were scanner and gun. I don't remember what exactly Ginny or the lady said, but here is the closest re-enactment I could get.

"Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to scan all items of immediate and necessary needs for previously stated location of residence. Failure to do so will result in empty living quarters and bare floors. This message will self-destruct in 5, 4, 3, 2..."

After that I think I blacked out from the explosion, but my mission was clear. We set about finding and scanning what we needed... until at Bed, Bath and Beyond the lady there said, "Scan what you need and want." Well that Tuesday there wasn't much time to have fun with that. That's what Wednesday (and the rest of week off work for vacation) was for.

Let me just say that my mind had not fully grasped the magnitude of this statement until I saw IT. THE Magic Bullet. You know, from infomercial fame! I scanned it an immediate rush of ecstacy that only will be matched... nevermind. Next item? The George Foreman grill! I felt the presence of Mr. Foreman himself right beside me, whispering, "Well done!" in my ear. Moments later, I found the PowerJuicer, too! Infomercial products never die. They end up at Target for 29.99. Unfortunately, Fiancee would not allow the Magic Bullet to remain on the registry. Fear not, fans, for she has OK'd sports equipment at Target (golf balls basically).

So in closing, an ode to the scanner gun...

Oh, scanner gun

Your little red bar

Speaks to me deep

And fills me with glee

UPC codes have new meaning

When scanner gun is held

In the palm of my hand

The time will come

When we must depart

But, oh scanner gun,

You will always hold

A place in my heart

-D

Quite the Character

"Reputation is for time; character is for eternity." -J. B. Gough

Reputation is defined as "the estimation in which a person or thing is held, especially by the community or the public generally; repute: a man of good reputation." (Bold emphasis added by me.)

Interesting second word there. Estimation. Also interesting? "... by the community of the public generally." Reputation is how the public estimates you to be. And we all know that the public always has a good judge of character, right?

Ah, but character? It can be defined as "one of the attributes or features that make up and distinguish an individual." (Again emphasis added by yours truly.)

I don't mean to pick on any one person in particular, but this one was the first to pop into my head regarding this. That person? A certain famous golfer who hasn't been playing much golf recently. His reputation prior to Thanksgiving 2009 used to be that of a great golfer with a beautiful family who kept his private life his private life. And then? Well, we all know what happened.

The point of this isn't to bash or judge anyone. The point is to say that there can be a disconnect between what we are and what people think we are. It's very easy to put on a public person of ______ only to really be _______ in private. You can have a good reputation but bad character, bad reputation but good character, bad both, or good both. While it's impossible to control what others think of you (short of Jedi mind tricks), what we can control is who we are. We can control our character. The choices we make when the public isn't watching ultimately defines who we are. Who we are around those closest to us defines who we are.

The quote from J. B. Gough is a good one, because it presents us with a choice. Do you care more about reputation - putting on a good face for the public? Or do you care more about character - leaving a lasting impression on your family and friends? Now that I have a daughter and another due in November, the idea of leaving a lasting impression takes on even greater meaning. What do I want them to remember about me? It won't be whether I bought them whatever cool toy they wanted. It won't be whether I bought them a car. It won't be what those in my professional field say about me. It will be how much I loved them, how much I cherished them, how much time I spent with them, how I loved my wife, and what lessons they learned - not from what I said to them, but from how I lived my life. A strong character is an investment that pays eternal dividends.

-D

The Fine Art of Worrying

Worry. It's one of those things that we all do, whether we want to or not. It can come on quickly and can linger for a long time. When it comes to worry, some of us have it down pat more than others. What can we do to combat worry? Well, when it comes to questions about things like this: I think it's always wise to consult someone wise - Jesus.

"Therefore don't worry about tomorrow, because tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

Why should we not worry about tomorrow? Well, for one thing, it's tomorrow. It's the next day. But if you take it one more step, what is tomorrow? It's always a day away. Tomorrow never actually arrives. We never get to tomorrow. Why worry about a day that never actually arrives? When we worry about tomorrow, we lessen the quality of today. Who knows what we might miss out on because we spend time worrying about what could happen tomorrow or in a week or month or year?

The apostle Paul gives us some advice in the book of Philippians about stress and worry.

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God."

It's fairly straightforward. Pray. Be thankful. Present what worries you to The One who can handle all worry.

John Ortberg, in his book God is Closer than You Think, says this about worry, “We live under the illusion that worry enhances our ability to control the world. Somehow we fear that if we stop worrying about something completely, it will really go wrong. So we worry as if we're still in control of something that's actually completely out of our hands... the great danger of these worries is not just that they make my life emotionally unpleasant. It is that they distract me from the presence of God in my life.”

How can we keep from being distracted?

"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."

Jesus offers this advice in Matthew 6 (right before telling us not to worry). Seek Him. Why? Because when we do, we leave less room for distraction from worry. Because we are eliminating our need to control by putting His kingdom first. We focus on His agenda, not our own.

We all worry. We all have stress or anxiety. If we let it get to us too much, our health can suffer; our relationships can suffer; and our faith can falter. Instead of letting that happen, remember what Paul said, "Do not be anxious about anything." Let The One whose shoulders can bear the worry actually bear the worry.

-D

All-Time Trust

"Trust in Him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts before Him. God is our refuge." -Psalm 62:8 (HCSB)

There are two interesting thoughts I had. How both good times and bad times can lead us to not trust in God.

When things go well, we credit ourselves. When things go bad, we point the finger at God.

How people can think like this is beyond me - but yet when I drill down to the guts of it, I'm like that, too. More so with the good times than the bad. Because when things go bad, I go to Him as my refuge. Of course the question is do I do that right away? Which of course the answer is not always. David's message to the people is that God can be trusted and should be trusted all the time. He is our refuge. He hears us when we pour our hearts out to Him. In good and bad, we must trust Him. Because He has proven His trust-ability to be 100%.

Trust Him all the time. Because He is trustworthy all the time. Live in His trust. Take refuge in His trust. Be bold in His trust.

-D

The Birth Story: Daddy's Perspective

This is a special "From the Vault" post. I wrote this on Novmeber 1, 2010. Being that today our precious Ny turns one, I thought it very appropriate to post this recollection of the day our lives changed for the best forever. Enjoy...

File this post away as "the one that got away" - or that I have been meaning to write for a long time but never got around to it. I would normally blame procrastination but actually have a much better reason.

Fatherhood is one of those things that, at least for me, you can prepare for but in the back of your mind know that you're not even remotely ready for. We found out a year ago that we were going to be parents. We found out 8 months ago that we were having a girl. Then in the middle of July, our little girl entered the world.

So how did that day go? I'm glad you asked, because you're about to get an inside look at what was going through this guy's mind.

The best place to start would be back in June, when G and I made two "trial runs" to the hospital because she had intense back pain which we thought could be back labor. I'll direct you here to get all the details. That experience helped us better prepare for the real thing - what to pack, where to go, layout of the hospital, and, for me, how much wi-fi there would be. A word of advice for fathers-to-be: take a comfortable pillow and blanket, because the hospital sofa is anything but.

Fast forward a few weeks later to a Sunday night/Monday morning. I was having some trouble sleeping, got up, and checked out the weather (shocker), which showed a line of thunderstorms approaching our area. After I finally fell back asleep, I awoke at 6 to get ready for work. There was one hiccup though. G was already awake and told me, "Babe, I'm having contractions." "Um.. what?!?" "I've been having them since 3:45 this morning." At that point, plans to go to work were abandoned (which turned out to be a good thing, because it rained ridiculously hard that morning), and I opted to work from home in the event of, well, you know. The day went on; the contractions continued every 15-30 minutes; and both of us went about our day as best as possible. Needing to get out of the house, both of us decided to head out to Sam's - just to walk around and enjoy what could very well be our last night with only two of us. We got back, ate dinner, and were going to play Mario Party 8 on the Wii... when we decided to go to Target. Again, another nice time for both of us to (slowly) meander around one of our favorite places.

By the time we got home, it was getting late. We were getting ready for bed when G expressed concern that her water may have been leaking. Not wanting to take any chances, we got our things together - calmly I might add - and made the 15-minute drive to the hospital. Another bit of advice for fathers-to-be: they're going to take your wife back for 5 hours 20 minutes to ask her some questions and make sure she feels safe with you; just be prepared to wait and be nervous. When they let me back to see her, she had progressed nicely, but the water had not broken, and our little girl was still not ready to arrive. After an hour, the nurse told us that, while we would have a baby in the next 24 hours, it was ok to go home, as nothing was really happening. We made the drive home, left all of our things packed, and climbed back into bed.

2:00 AM. I had been asleep for about an hour. My wife wakes me. "Babe, my water broke." Ok, time to go again. Now before I go any further, let me say that break does not even begin to describe it. It was a flood that soaked the sheets on her side of the bed. So again, we climb in the car (bags still in the trunk) and arrive back at the hospital. One of the nurses that saw us earlier happened to be walking by as we were checking in again. G was showing me more water that was leaking. Said nurse saw said water running down G's pants and uttered, "Oh yeah, her pants are soaked. Admit her now." More waiting on my part. Phone call to both of our moms. Update facebook status to "Water break does not even begin to describe what just happened." Come back to room to see my wife.

The morning went on. The contractions got stronger. G was in more pain. The epidural was given. G was not in pain anymore. Our moms both arrived within 30 minutes of each other, claiming they couldn't sleep. That was ok with us. Their being there helped pass the time quicker. They also rocked the cafeteria and scored me some bacon and chocolate milk. Yes, I am 11 years old. Around 9:00, the nurse checked G and said it was time to start pushing. The moms left. And I tried my best to avoid passing out for 30 minutes while G started pushing. More advice to dads-to-be: be ready to use a cold washcloth for your wife... and yourself. Of course, you probably do hospitals better than me.

The pushing passed the one-hour mark. At that point, G's doctor came in to assist. G continued to push, but that little girl just would not move past one tight spot. The doctor laid out our options: keep pushing for an hour and hope she moves OR have a C-section. Neither one of us wanted option 2. But at this point, with little progress made in 2 hours, we both agreed that the C-section was best. I notified our moms of the situation, got dressed up in some scrubs, hat, and mask, and walked with my wife to the surgery room...

Or not. It turns out I had to wait out in a hallway before being let in to see her. Longest. 15. Minutes. Ever. The thoughts are running through my head a mile a minute. Is everything ok? Is Ginny ok? Is our baby ok? Why am I waiting out here? I took a deep breath, said a prayer, and looked up to see one of the doctors coming to get me. Once in there, I sat by Ginny as they had the sheet up, working to get Ny out. One of the doctors told me to get the camera ready. I stood up, watched as they struggled to yank Ny out, and then smiled as we heard the most beautiful cry ever. She was finally here!

I walked over to the nurse's station while they cleaned Ny up, gave her a vitamin K shot, and cleaned up the poo that Ny took all over the equipment. That's my girl! She was still upset, as one would expect when being yanked into a cold room. I started talking to her, and, in an effort to secure an early pony promise, she immediately stopped crying and actually turned her head toward me. (There's a picture a nurse took of me with my hands in a position that shows how much I wanted to hold her.) Oh, man. She had me from that point on. They checked her length - 21 inches. They checked her weight - 9 pounds, 8 ounces! Then they swaddled her up tight and gave her to me. Let me tell you this - nothing will EVER prepare you for the moment you hold a new life that you created for the first time. I think I spent the next 10 minutes just staring at her. I brought her over to a now-sobbing G, who was getting sewn up. Little Ny just laid there in my arms and looked up. Once G was patched up, off we went to recovery.

That was the first time G got to hold Ny, who was still alert and looking up at us. I took pictures with the camera and cell phone, preparing for the exclusive facebook photos. We both sat there, exhausted from a long night but in awe that our baby girl was finally here. This little life that grew in G's tummy finally entered the world in all of her beauty and innocence. Even today, I am still blown away by holding her or rocking her or feeding her or just staring at her. From one single cell to a now 15-week old, healthy girl. What a blessing she is.

Daddy loves you, Ny.

-D

Insight and Understanding

Proverbs 16:21-22
21 The wise in heart are called discerning, and pleasant words promote instruction.
22 Understanding is a fountain of life to those who have it, but folly brings punishment to fools.

One of the general themes in Proverbs is to live a righteous life. Many verses detail the advantages of living such a life - Proverbs 11:5-6 for example.

As I read these verses, I really thought about those two qualities: discernment and understanding (or insight as the HCSB translates it). What is discernment? What is insight? And how do these two help in living a righteous life?

Discernment: As I think about discernment, I think about the ability to look at a situation both at and beyond the surface to make the right decision. A discerning heart has the ability to know what to say or do in that situation. Not only does a discerning person know what to say/do, he also knows when and how to say/do it. When this person speaks, people listen, because his words are measured to reflect what he wants to say and what the Bible says. Correction and instruction are most successful when the words are chosen carefully and said with the correct feeling or emotion given the situation and person. The wise in heart have this discernment, and as such, others will listen to the words they speak. The wise person has influence because he can communicate effectively and bring others along.

Insight/Understanding: Insight, to me, is having additional knowledge beyond what is basically known. Why are color commentators for sports (generally) ex-players? They have insight. They have knowledge of the sport beyond what the average person knows. To have insight is to have more knowledge or experience. To have that extra bit of information makes a big difference. Why is it a fountain of life for those who have it? Because extra knowledge gives you an edge. In the context of the spiritual life, having insight guards us from making bad decisions. You gain insight by gaining more knowledge, which for us comes from more time spent with God. Insight is our fountain of life because we have the spiritual knowledge to avoid the pitfalls of life that the fool falls into over and over.

Thoughts to ponder: Do I possess a discerning spirit? Does my fountain of life flow from understanding? Do I value discernment and understanding? Do I recognize that to live a righteous life and be transformed I must possess discernment and insight? In what areas of my life am I weak in discernment and insight? Am I working to strengthen those areas under the Word of God?

-D

Baby #2 Reveal!!!

Thank you all for coming to the party tonight
Seeing all of your friendly faces really is quite the sight

Before we tell you the gender of baby number two
Here’s a little story – told just for you

Many moons ago in two thousand and nine
The results of that test warmed Ginny’s heart and mine

As you all know, fine, fair ladies and gents
The big news was that we would become parents

And in the middle of summer, in the heat of July
We heard our sweet Nyla cry her first cry

Indeed with sweet Nyla we have surely been blessed
Even though at times, we have gotten little rest

Now here we are, gathered together again
We’d hoped this would happen but didn’t know when

This next line will make you spit your drink in your cup
Because, yep, you guessed it, I knocked Ginny up

Nyla’s going to be a big sister this we know
“Well, duh,” you’re all thinking, “Get on with the show!”
Boy? Or girl? You’re just dying to find out!
This poem is going on too long without a doubt!

It’s great to be surrounded by such great family and friends
As you can tell I’m stalling for time – the poem never ends

Let me pause for a moment and thank God above
For our parents who showed us all about love

Ok, enough is enough! Let’s get to why you’re here
I see the crowd smiling, wanting to let out a cheer

The excitement is building; you can feel it in the air
A poet of my talents is really quite rare

As I conclude I just want to say
Thanks to you all for coming today

So now let me proudly announce our bundle of joy
Is a healthy, developing, and great baby… GIRL!